Putting out Fires

“Thank you for being so supportive.  You’re like a big ole Platex bra.”

Mika The Devil Dog almost died today.

Or new neighbors to the North have a wolf ‘hybrid’ who is so tall that she can get her whole head and both front feet over the wall between our houses.  It is terrifying to go in the backyard and hear that ferocious bark and look over and see a monster looking over the wall.  And if that dog is hybrid of anything, its wolf and WOLF. 

That dog goes especially crazy when my poor pups go outside to do their business.  Naturally Karma and Mika are curious about the dog intruding their space, so they go over to the wall to inspect.  However, neither one of them can get withing a foot of the top of the wall, even if they jump. 

Today I came home from work and let the dogs out as usual and the next thing I know there’s yelping coming from the backyard.  When I run outside to see what was happening, I see poor little 40lb Mika HANGING BY HER CHEEK from that beast’s mouth!  I had to run over there and threaten to hit the dog to get it to let her go. 

Well, once I made sure that Mika wasn’t bleeding or missing an eye, I stomped straight over to the house next door.  Boy are they lucky that they weren’t home.  I was fit to be tied and raring for a fight.  Would the police do anything?  What’s wrong with these evil people that they can’t manage their dogs?  Don’t they have any respect for their neighbors.

After getting calmed down by my dad on the phone, I went back over and left a note for the neighbors to call me.  When the woman did, I went over and tried the tactic of ‘I just want to keep your dogs and our dogs safe’ instead of being mad.  I was expecting a fight, but instead I found a woman who had been dying to meet me and didn’t know how.  A woman who was mortified by what happened to my poor pup.  A woman who gave me every single phone number she could think of to get ahold of her….just in case. 

So the moral of the story:  If you give people the benefit of the doubt and let them have a chance to be good people, you might be surprised.  But I’m still going to carry pepper spray whenever I go in the backyard.

True story!  My husband has a slot machine injury.  Why is it that they make the machines such that you have to reach up to play?  Wouldn’t it make more sense if they made you so comfortable that you’d never want to get up? 

Last Thursday Karl Denson was in town.  (I don’t expect you to know who that is, but if you do, you’re my new best friend)  As is becoming a bit more common, I was going to have to go see him solo because of Ryan’s schedule, but instead I enlisted my brother (who also had never heard of him, but he’s a good sport and I was paying) to go with me.

On the day of, Ryan was acting strange on the phone every time I talked to him.  I knew he was upset about having to miss the concert, so I chalked it up to that.  Boy was I surprised when I opened theh garage door at home after work and there was his car!  Sneaky man!  Then he sits me down on the couch with my eyes closed and when I open them there’s an empty suitcase.  He told me to pack as quickly as I could.  A surprise trip?!  Who are you and where is my husband?!

After I’d frantically thrown everything in the bag that I could imagine needing for any place we might go, we loaded up the dogs and drove over to my parents’ house.  I’m glad that the surprise still included the concert and the company of my bro that night.  Two rounds of saki bombers each and a few extra beers thrown in for fun, and three of us thoroughly enjoyed the hippy spectacle that is a Karl Denson concert. 

The next morning, after stumbling into the guest room at my parents’ trying not to wake the whole neighborhood at 1am, we woke up at 6am.  Then my dad drove us to teh AIRPORT.  A surprise trip involving a plane ride!?  I still had no idea what was going on, so when the guy at the check-in asked where we were flying today, I said, “I have no idea!”.  WHERE ARE WE GOING?!

VEGAS BABY!

To summarize our trip to Vegas, here’s our version of Best of Vegas:

1.  Best Hotel on the Strip:  NYNY, hands down.  I have never been treated with so much good service at a hotel.  From the time the bell boy took our bags from us at the taxi, to the time he brought them back down, then went out of their way for us.

(View from our killer room)

2.  Best Place to Get Drunk at Nickel Slots:  Excalibur.  There’s a series of 5 video poker machines right next to a bar, so the ladies in the short skirts carrying trays were coming by us about every 5 minutes.  Mmm, free beer tastes the best.

(Ryan won over $100 on a nickle machine!)

3.  Best Place to Spend $10/drink in a Bathing Suit with People Constantly Screaming Overhead:  NYNY pool.  The towel boy actually got our chairs for us!  Didn’t even have to move to get a drink.  And watching the rollercoaster scream overhead was constant entertainment.

4.  Best Place to Watch a Girl Get VERY INVOLVED Body Shots off her Bare Chest by Both Her Male and Female Friends:  The dueling piano bar at NYNY.  I kid you not, there was SUCKING involved!  Ryan and I stood with all the other old people outside the bar with our jaws at our feet.

5.  Best Place to Run Into People You Know:  MGM.  Both of us saw people we knew there!  Including my ex-boyfriend’s brother.  Awkward. 

(Haven’t these guys learned ANYTHING from poor Roy?)

6.  Worst Airline in the Whole World:  Southwest.  I don’t think we need any explanation on that one.

7.  Worst Day of the Year to Fly Anywhere:  September 11th.

So, in closing:  My husband is the best there is.  Not only does he surprise me occasionally, but he’s also the most fun person I know and I’m lucky to have him as a travel partner.  Even when dealing with crowds of drunk people, parents with totally out-of-control children, and the misplacement of about $300 that fell into slot machines, we always have a great time together. 

I feel like I can’t turn on anything, a TV, a radio, my computer, without being inundated with images.  And stories.  I heard last night on the TV about how its normal for us to feel helpless, and panicked, and guilty, and depressed, even if we live 1525.60 miles away.  I can deal with the people stories.  We understand what’s happening and that someone will eventually come to save us.  We know that you shouldn’t drink dirty water and that you should get out of the city.  We know that if we see a helicopter, its coming for us.

But the animals.  I can barely write it without crying.  They don’t understand where their families went.  Or that they’ll never see them again.  And that no one is coming to save them because they’re too busy telling idiots who refuse to leave that they must.  Or they just don’t care.  Dogs sitting on flooded cars waiting.  Animals left behind by crying children at shelters because they’re not allowed on the bus. 

I feel helpless.  And miserable.  And helpless….  All those loved pets lost, drowning, waiting, dying. 

Ah yes, until now I’ve been small enough in cyberspace to escape the meme.  Thanks a lot M. 

1. Number of Books you have owned. “Have owned”?  As in total?  OK, I’m addicted to books and my husband has to rip them away from my poor, pathetic, crying self just so I’ll make a pile to take to Bookmans to exchange.  We just had to turn a whole room in our house into a Reading Room to house them all.  A reader who is also a packrat is the worst combination.

2. Last book I bought. The last book I bought was Charlie and the Chocolate factory.  I read it in an afternoon before we went to see the movie.  I loved The BFG and James and the Giant Peach when I was growing up, but somehow I missed this one.  That is one twisted man, that Dahl. 

3. Last book I completed. Lamb : The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal.  This book was a gift from my friend Jen and it was HILARIOUS.  Biff has been brought back to fill in the gap in Jesus’ life not discussed in the Bible.  In the course of their travels to prepare Jesus for being The One, they check out hot chicks (Biff actually ‘takes one for the team’ by trying some out and describing the experiences to his celebate friend), learn kungfu (although Jesus learned a new form of martial arts called ‘Jew-do’, I kid you not), master yoga, fight odd demons, and other outrageous stuff.  Seriously funny.

4. Five books that mean a lot to me.

This is a hard one.  I want to talk about all the inspiring books I’ve come across, or books important in literary history, but I’m not in that kind of mood right now.  So here’s books that really affected me in some way. 

·                  Lord of the Rings.  Yes, I actually read the book.  And if you haven’t, shame on you.  This book is masterfully written, unbelievably creative, and it is the only book I have ever finished sobbing.    

·                    Madonna’s book Sex.  I didn’t even ‘read’ this book, but it had a huge impact on my life.  Because of this book I got a taste of politics, 2 days of front page state-wide coverage, top story on the news stations, a short clip of me shown on MTV, and a blurb in People.  Interested?  That’s a story for another post.

·                    Way of the Peaceful Warrior.  Ryan and I have both studied karate and I’m really interested in studying what is behind the movements.  This book, besides being a really good, very entertaining story, does just that.  You’d be hard pressed to read this book and not come away with something that will affect your life.  Maybe that’s why the actual title of the book is:  Way of the Peaceful Warrior; A Book That Changes Lives.

·                    Joy of Cooking, 1975.  Who knew that this book would be so hard to get?  Took me a few months on Ebay to find the perfect one.  This book has a special place on my shelves because it is the best cooking guide ever written, and after 1975 they revised Joy of Cooking taking out a lot of the popular recipes.  Mine’s in mint condition and if you can love a book, I love this one.

·                    Life of Pi.  This is a great book.  Not only was it totally entertaining, but I loved the turmoil  that the young main character felt over trying to understand why there are so many different religions in the world.  If for no other reason, you should read this book to see how a boy survives on a raft, in the middle of the ocean, with a wounded zebra, a spotted hyena, a seasick orangutan, and a 450-pound Bengal tiger.  This book is important to me because it is rare that Ryan gets into a book like this, but he loved it and it led to some great conversations.

If I had room for 2 more:  Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.  Truthfully I didn’t read the whole book as it was totally repetitive, but I swear to you I feel like the peace in my household is due to some of the information I got out of this book.  Also, Anthem by Ayn Rand.  Of all the books I read in high school, this is the one that I’ve gone back and read again.

5. What are you currently reading? I’m always in the middle of a few books.  Right now my main book is All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot. This is the first in a series written about his real life experiences being a vet in rural England.  He’s well-known in England and the books are supposed to be really funny, so I’m looking forward to getting into it.

6. Who are the bloggers you are passing this on to?

 

Well, let’s see who….

First of all, I have to say africankelli.  I’ve borrowed so many books from her, and we have very different tastes, so I’m interested to see if she can narrow down her favorites.

Dr. Charles.  I find his writing fascinating and am wondering what he’s reading.(Also, congrats on your new book!)

Has Mr. H.K. been tagged yet?  If not, I’d sure like to read that one.

Cruising around the blogosphere its interesting that so many people have such strong memories attached to Labor Day.  A little, tiny insignificant holiday to break up the monotony between 4th of July and Thanksgiving.  Well I’ve got a memory attached to the day too, so here you go…

6 years and 2 weeks ago I moved to Flagstaff, Arizona into my very first apartment at college.  The Pines.  I lived in a 2 bedroom, 2 bath with 3 other girls.  My roommate Jill and I had a bunk bed w/ a pullout futon on the bottom that we thought was a brilliant idea.  Many Kahlua mudslides in I managed to build myself INTO the bunk bed, but that’s a different story…

The day my girls and I got up to Flag to move in, we pulled in to the parking lot at the same time as a shiny red Mustang.  We all watched as two gorgeous, muscled guys straight from the gym stepped out, and my mom in all her infinite wisdom said, “I think you’re going to have a good time here.”   Little did we know…

Just two weeks later we’d already settled in and had made friends with our maintenance guy and had pumped him for information on the cute boys in the apartment around the corner from ours.  On Labor Day weekend, we had my girlfriends up for the weekend for a visit.  We all decided that we should have ourselves a party to celebrate our new-ound freedom, so we called up all the cute boys we knew (and a few token girls) and invited everyone over for that night.

That afternoon we girls got back to the apartment complex after stocking up with party supplies and sitting in the parking lot surrounded by instrument cases was Cute Guy #1.  Spurred on by a dare from my giggling girlfriends, I bravely walked straight up to him and asked, “Are you Ryan, Ryan, Jeff or Craig?”  Turns out that this Ryan was pretty shy, but I invited him to the party that night anyway.

About 6 hours later the party was in full swing.  Then the cops showed up (thank you heinous downstairs neighbors!).  As I was one of the only 21 year-olds at the party, it fell to me to assure them that the co-ed drunken Twister would end.  (I should note here that the under 21’s were all hiding in showers and the legal people were doing body shots in the kitchen just within my view.  Thanks for the support guys!)  As I was talking to our friendly Men in Blue, I saw coming around the corner Ryan and his roommate holding illegal underaged beer.  They took one look at my guests at the door and turned right around and went home.

Luckily for me, Ryan and Jeff came back later when the coast was clear, and even luckier was that when Ryan went through my CD collection he found some things that his discerning taste approved of.  Specifically:  Miles and Coltrane. 

And the rest, as they say, is history.

The only time there is ever any animosity in my house is when it involves money. Isn’t that true for everyone? People who don’t have it want it, and people who have it want more.

Most of our discussions about money revolve around why we don’t have enough to buy fun stuff, and how it is that the people around us seem to have all kinds of fun things when we can’t imagine they have much more money than we do. Trucks, boats, nice houses, vacations, camping trailers, extra vehicles for fun… How can they afford all those things? What are we doing wrong?

Firefighters are the worst for this. Just last week we went to a firefighter’s house for a party. This guy is really young, with two small kids, and a girlfriend who is still in college. I know how much (or how LITTLE) he makes because it’s the same as Ryan, but they just bought a new house that’s a 3 storey split-level in Scottsdale with a big yard. Then some of their ff friends show up and they’re all riding really nice motorcycles talking about going water skiing with their boats the next day.

On a tangent from that: I know that the main reason that we don’t have money for extras is because we’re savers. I’m sitting on a nice 401k, and we’ve got a little money sitting other places, so I sleep well at night. I know that if I lost my job, or needed something for an emergency I’m set. Political tangent: so why is it that our government doesn’t run themselves the same way? I know this is a simpleton question, but where the heck does $10.5 BILLION come from for hurricane relief? Why is it that everyone in this country isn’t standing up and shouting about the huge debt this country is sitting in? I have a Masters in Business and even I can’t logically explain how it is that we can come up with that much money when we have NEGATIVE money. If I ran my house like that, well, I guess we would have all the toys we want. (but as a positive for our fearless leader, at least now he can blame this one on terrorists too!)

On a different subject, yesterday I dragged Ryan to yoga with me. It was really good and I felt super stretchy afterward. We then went home and counteracted our workout with Thursday Night Drinking Night; my favorite night of the week! Our big activity of the night? Hide-and-go-seek with the puppies for like an hour after a few beers. I’m telling you, it is their favorite game, but they’re getting too good at it and we only have 1300sq ft to do it in, so the game is pretty limited. There’s a lot of hiding in showers and under blankets.

My only big plan for the holiday weekend is Couples Game Night at Min’s house. We’re all supposed to bring a game to share. Think I ought to bring the ’special’ board game we got from Spencers?

(and to answer the question in the title: nobody notices.  hehehe)