Down Day
I may be the only person in the world who actually looks forward to jury duty. For one, it gets me out of work, and two, I think it would be so interesting to sit on a trial. So imagine my utter disappointment when yesterday I called in at 4:30 the business day before (already planning my best juror outfit in my head) and I’m told that my group has been excused and my duty has been fullfilled. EXCUSED? After the day I had at work yesterday I really needed, for my health, to have a reason to not go in today.
So, I called in sick. Truth be told, I was feeling rather ill leaving work yesterday (and M, just so you know, you’re not the only one who cried at work this week). Today I’ve dedicated myself to finding a new job, and to celebrating my husband’s birthday. He has to work today (big surprise) so I baked a cake to take to the guys later.
Now here I am. Its just about the time I would have been getting off work, and I can’t believe how much more quickly the time passes when I’m not stuck in that place. Yesterday I had a full on break-down at work, and now instead of wishing I had a different job, I’m actively looking. But I have a problem. I hate being an engineer. I kept telling myself that if I just got a job in a different engineering department, I’d be so much better off. But honestly, I wouldn’t be. I would still feel bored and unfulfilled. How do I just give up this career that I prepared for? And how do I find a job for comprable pay without having any other experience than I have? And if I decided to give up engineering, how would I know what the right career field is for me?
In other news: I went and saw the new baby yesterday. I’m telling you, this kid is adorable. When we got there she was all swaddled and someone just tucked her into my arms and she slept their forever making little baby sleeping sounds. But again, as soon as Ryan and I walked into the room, someone said, “So, does this make you 2 want to do it now?” I hate to admit it, but I’ve gotten a little defensive about this lately because its starting to feel less like kidding around, more like people saying, “You’re SUPPOSED to be having kids now, you’re 27 for heaven’s sake”. I fight feeling defensive about it because I know the more I defend our choice, the more I find myself convincing me that we’re never going to do it. And I don’t want to close the door on the idea. And honestly, I do know that if it is right for us, then it’ll be time, but not before then. (But I did have a dream last night that my friend Rebecca called and told me secretly that she and her husband were trying. Seriously, babies on the brain.)
So now I’m going to go buy my man some socks for his camping trip this weekend. Its my big outting of the day. Exciting, huh? Hopefully I won’t run into any of my coworkers, because then I’ll have to explain about my mental and emotional sick day, and I don’t really feel like doing that. See ya!
can we take a sick day together? we can have cervesa all day long. you can come work with me. we have some openings.
a) 27 is YOUNG.
b) hoo. The job. Where do I start? My roommate is 29 and has recently come to the conclusion that she doesn’t want to be an engineer, either. I know that I could never, ever be a designer again. That is my own private hell. But I like what I’m doing now (I know I’m being annoyingly cryptic about it, but I’m sure that on business trips I’ll end up blogging from my work computer, so I’d rather play it super-safe). I know it’s not a career, but it’s a great way to earn some bling for a few years. It’s dynamic and challenging. Anyway, don’t feel pigeonholed by your education; across all different sectors of the technical world, people LURVE us. Finance, management, technical recruiting, etc… don’t throw away “engineering,” just look at it in a different light.
Will get off high horse now. Hey, I think my company is hiring in January. It’s a great place to work. Wanna move to Montreal??? I’ll fully hook you up.
I completely agree with M on the job front. YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT. we just need to brainstorm what that is. Maybe you should start your own business. You have a head for numbers, what would you like to do? and don’t worry about the pay scale, if you’re happy, the money will come.
You will find the job. It will speak to you. I think it is time for you to get out. Screw the vesting.
And no, I am not trying.
I am going through some real soul searching about work right now too. I also cried at work this week.. haha i don’t know if that is funny or sad. I’m only 26 and have been at my place of employment for 12 years. Leaving seems unimaginable at times. I figure I will know (really know) when it is time to leave. It sounds like you are at that point and I am happy for you. At least now you have a starting poing. You have one thing figured out; you definitely don’t want to be there anymore. So good luck to you and you seem like a smart girl who won’t have trouble getting what you really want. I don’t know if I told you this already but I found your blog through Michele and blogrolled you I hope that’s ok
I would love to be on Jury Duty, especiially if it was a good murder case. Somehow, I can’t see that happening.
Michele sent me; you have a lovely blog, Jen
I’m hanging out for the day I get to be on a jury but would that make it a hung jury?
The dogs next door sound awful, I’m not an animal person so have little tolerance for other people’s troublesome pets. A friend of mine used to have a goldfish that really annoyed me.
Good luck with job hunt/career change/house move.
Reading between the lines you don’t sound too happy, hope things improve for you.
GB
Take care
Marcus (via Michele)